Saturday, October 31, 2009

Sad Halloween

Dear Aiwyn,
When we were at the pumpkin patch you were scared of all the pumpkins and I waited until last night to show you "our" pumpkin because I was afraid you would have the same reaction. You did. You got scared and cried at the sight of a perfectly round uncarved pumpkin.

I've always loved carving pumpkins and for years I have begged/dragged your Pops to go pick out a pumpkin and then we think of a design and then carve it together. Lets just say it hasn't always been "his thing." But for the last 2-3 years he has asked me "when are we going to pick out our pumpkin?". I'm not sure if he just asks because he know I want to go or if he's had a change of heart and perhaps he gets a little joy out of the tradition?! Your Pops and I didn't carve a pumpkin this year. Number one reason is we were short on time. We bought the pumpkin exactly a week before Halloween. Number two, I just didn't feel up to it. I would have to carve it out of sight of you and you wouldn't be able to enjoy it lit... where's the fun in that? Besides, I said we were short on time..... I would rather be hanging out with you, than carving a pumpkin in a different room from you.

Today you were really sad. You only took about 45 minutes of your morning nap because of one really loud, obnoxious dog that lives in this house. Which meant I didn't get to shower while you napped (I was trying to put away laundry before hopping in the shower). So after you woke, I brought you into the bathroom with me while I showered. You are usually fine. Today you were not. You were so upset, you started sobbing. I spent the next 1 1/2 hours holding you and trying to calm you while I was in a robe with soaking wet hair. Your Grammy asked me why you were so upset. My response was "she didn't tell me." It can be so frustrating to not know what's wrong. It makes me so sad when you are sad. I suspect you were just upset because you have a top tooth that is about a hair width from feeling the air when you give that goofy smile.

I was planning on taking you to Grammy & Grampy's house in your costume and then running by Cooper's house (our cutie pie neighbor dinosaur) when we got home. But because we had such a rough day, I thought it was best that we stayed home. We spent a lot of time playing and rolling around on the floor together and I took some pictures of you in your costume. You were a Glow worm, but your Grandma had made you a tutu and so I also dressed you up in that.

I hope next year, pumpkins won't seem so scary and we can go out and do some trick or treating. And hopefully all those teeth will be in.




Tuesday, October 27, 2009

Picking out a Pumpkin

Dear Aiwyn,
I have always loved the ritual of picking out a pumpkin, coming up with a design to carve, and the act of pumpkin carving. But this process always starts with picking a pumpkin. I was so excited to take you to the pumpkin patch to pick out your 1st pumpkin. I was going to get all kinds of cute pictures of you. Pictures of you next to pumpkins, on a pumpkin, standing and holding onto a pumpkin, etc. However, we only really got a few pictures of you in the pumpkin patch. Your Pops was wearing you as walked through the patch trying to find the perfect pumpkin. We picked one out and when I picked it up to show you, you freaked out and started crying. You were so scared! So I moved the pumpkin away and we calmed you down. So then we thought maybe you would do better if you were standing next to a pumpkin.... wrong. Again, you freaked out. So, we decided we had to get at least one picture of you alone with a pumpkin....

Today is 3 days later and I still haven't "shown" you the pumpkin again to see how you react... I'm a little worried. Our pumpkin may be uncarved this year?!


Saturday, October 17, 2009

8 Months plus some

Dear Aiwyn,
We just recently got back from visiting family in Missouri. I flew alone with you again (your 1st time you were 2 1/2 months old). The 1st time we flew together, we found out or flight was canceled when we got to the airport and they rescheduled us for the next flight 4 hours later. To compensate the airline gave me a $50 credit to use within a year which helped me decide to go for another visit. This time when we arrived at the airport, they informed me they overbooked the flight and they were asking for people to give up their seats. I was super smart and upgraded to business class. We had so much more room during the flight. You were the great baby you always are and didn't fuss the entire time during both flights. After we landed in St. Louis I was in the gate restroom looking for a changing station and I was stopped by a family (grandma, mom, and 7 year old daughter) who wanted to coo over you. I told your Grandmama that we were held up in the restroom with a family that wanted to see and talk to you and that we get stopped often for that reason. Whenever we are out, there is always someone that talks to you. We have nicknamed you the "Charmer." You give everyone a great big smile and squint those irresistible eyes at them. And if they're lucky you even bounce or kick your legs. You proved to Grandmama that this happens often. When we were in Wal-mart, Grandmama was getting some food and I took you to the baby section to look around for a hat. There was a woman speeding through the baby area with just a few groceries in her arms until she saw you. She was walking so fast that she was about 10 feet past us when she stopped and turned around to talk to you. You flashed her that smile as she sped past and she couldn't resist you. She stopped and talked for a few minutes as if she had no where to go (despite being in a rush the first time she passed us). Then Grandmama met up with us and the lady was still there talking- you are definitely the Charmer.

You are still not crawling, but really you don't "need" to because you roll everywhere and you're getting pretty fast flipping across the floor. Just this week you have been getting really good at pushing up on your arms, lifting your entire chest off the floor and pivoting around. You like to prop your feet up on things too. So you will roll over to the ottoman or to Puja and prop your legs up. Yesterday morning after you finished nursing, you rolled onto your back and then propped your left leg onto my right hip. It was really cute and sweet.

You are standing like a champ. You will stand when we hold you or put you in front of something for you to hold onto. When you stand you tend to lock your knees, so when I try to "walk" you forward your legs are stiff and I can't even get you to put one in front of the other. I'm in no hurry for you to walk or for me to be chasing you. You will bounce your legs when we say "boing, boing, boing" and you laugh.

You still have only two front, bottom teeth (24, 25). You were really teething at the beginning of the month and I can see the two top incisors (6, 11) right under the gums. Then you stopped drooling so much and it was like they just stopped right there. Now it looks like your left front, top incisor (9) is moving down. You love your food and open your mouth really big for all your bites. You have even started eating some chunkier foods. Your Pops and I are still working on baby signs with you. You think "more" and "all done" are hilarious and you laugh and bounce when we sign them.

You are so curious about the world around you. You love to look around when we go out. I now face you outwards when I "wear" you so you don't get a cramp in your neck from craning it so far. You don't have much patience for nursing especially during the day time. If there is the tiniest noise you pop off and turn to look. The best time of day that you nurse is in the morning. You just nurse and snuggle with me and I LOVE IT!!! It takes every cell in my body to peel me out of bed to go to get ready for work in the mornings. I've had a hard time this month coping with being a working mom. I've always felt a little guilty about leaving you since I returned from maternity leave. But this month I had a co-worker friend who decided to not return to work and it has been hard for me. I've heard other co-workers say things like "when you look at that baby, how could you leave it" or "she's such a good mama." As a family I have to work for us to afford living and to have health insurance. I want you to know that I love you even when I am not with you. I look forward to seeing you at the end of every work day. When I have an bad day, all I think about is seeing your smiling face and giving you lots of kisses on those chubby cheeks and a nice snuggle before bed.

*I started this post on 10/17, but didn't finish it up until 10/27/09.